Honoring Self

Honoring yourself.

Two simple words. Yet I have clients who have a really hard time with this concept. Why? What does honoring mean? How many times is ‘self’ left out of the equation completely? How does ‘self’ now become part of the equation when you have spent a lifetime discounting yourself?

Honoring yourself means being conscious of how you are feeling and experiencing life’s circumstances at each given moment. But it doesn’t stop there. Instead, you must consciously ask yourself what you need to give yourself to feel that you are loving yourself.

As we grow and learn to live consciously, we must define (and constantly redefine ourselves.) We ask ourselves, “What is resonating with me?” or “What is not resonating with me at this time?” If we do not ask these questions and continue to grow, we begin to become stagnate, dull, cold, bitter, uncreative, lifeless. We give to others to feel better about ourselves; it seems as if we cannot please anyone. And as the law of attraction reminds us, we will keep getting what we are creating. None of us wants to continue to create feeling less than or lifeless, depleted, and angry.

We must grow. We must challenge ourselves. We must be brave to handle that just as children grow and out-grow toys, clothes, friendships...We, too, may out grow our lives, out grow relationships, out grow jobs, and out grow old paradigms that helped us define who we thought we were. This is necessary...for most of us did not come into the experience of this lifetime fully remembering our “I AM”ness. So living consciously means we continue to let go of things that no longer serve us and instead, setting new standards that we should live by.

When we do redefine ourselves, those around us may look at us like we are from another planet. They may not support the changes we are making. Recently I attended an event and realized that the speaker was working on a mental and emotional plane. The energy of the room went down. It was hard to stay focused. Later, processing with a friend, I realized that I can no longer be a part of a group that is not spiritually and healing focused.

Sounds easy, right? Make a decision and then things are perfect? Well...no.....About a week later, the universe tested my new resolve. I went to a required meeting, the first of a series of four. Of course, this group is not spiritually focused. I felt like a fish out of water. The things I wanted to share, the pain of the people in the group, the sharing of the other members overwhelmed me. Those lower energies of pain and shame and not being in a position to shift the energies to a higher spiritual plane caused internal conflict and was painful for me.

I questioned myself. When we declare something new about ourselves, we will be tested. If found myself with the opportunity to honor myself which can be tough. It would be so much easier to do what other’s expect and not rock the boat. However, I would feel out-of-alignment with who I truly am and what I am creating for myself.

When we try to honor ourselves, others may think we are a rebel...others may not understand...others may not support us. If you are reading this article you are one of the spiritual trailblazers....as such...you are are settling a new spiritual terrain. Being a spiritual trendsetter, you will be setting-up new paradigms to live by and new paradigms of structure for systems. You will be misunderstood; others will be confused; you may be rejected. We must let go of the need to please. When we are feeling pain, we must address our pain and attempt to resolve it. Wrap yourself in pink light---the light of unconditional love. Feel the love from the higher realms. Share from your heart about the wounds that are coming up to be healed. The person may not understand or care, but you can still honor yourself by looking at it and expressing your pain. In this way you are allowing healing of your deeper wounds.

Sometimes sharing from this deeper sacred space can offer a beautiful awakening for others as you honor yourself---your needs and desires. As you lovingly express yourself, you allow others to come into their own heart-space of compassion. You allow others to view life from a totally new perspective.

Setting new standards may not be easy, but it is necessary. This month ask yourself how to be more honoring. How can you then create a space for yourself in life to live this new standard with love and joy. You might find, just as I did, that others are respectful and supportive!

November